Saturday, January 24, 2009

24. Dear Daughter,

You are beautiful, big, strong, and intelligent. It is a joy and a privilege to watch you grow and develop; on good days the thought brings me to tears. When we encounter random strangers, the first thing they comment on, almost always, is how bright your eyes are - which amuses me, because that was one of my earliest nicknames for you.

It is not your fault that Januaries are always hard for me, or that this January has been a bad one for many people, and even worse than usual for me in particular. It is not your fault that I'm wading through (relatively) mild PPD. It is not your fault that you are, at this miserable time for me, developing so rapidly that you can't keep up with the changes, and so you cry and cry even when I cuddle you at my breast.

However, I would greatly appreciate it if you could manage to nap well this afternoon, and sleep well and easily and long tonight, so that I can get enough rest to cope with you without losing it myself for a little while longer.

Thank you,
your loving, frazzled, on-the-edge mother.

P.S. Be nice to your father, too!

P.P.S. To my readers - please leave comments! I want to hear your thoughts, and the more comments you leave, the better my blog traffic looks to places like MomCentral, who I'm trying to get to include me on blog tours.


wavybrains said...

Very sweet! I hope she naps too!

nicola said...

i hope she sleeps, i hope you feel better, and i am glad i am not the only one who feels this way sometimes!

Karinda said...

I wish I could come visit you so that we could share our tired, overwhelmed thoughts, but I'm too tired to go. LOL!

Rachel said...

*tear* i have GOT to move back to the left coast, if for no other reason than babysitting for you. kisses!