Friday, June 05, 2009

How do I find the words?

C, a woman of my acquaintance and a member of one of the larger mom's groups I'm a part of, lost her baby during birth last night. I don't know the full story, and probably may never, because I do not know C well, but I understand that it was something to do with a last-minute complication. Yes, I'm being deliberately vague.

I miscarried last month, sure, but I didn't know I was pregnant until I was already miscarrying. It was hard, I'm still mourning, but for me the worst part was just not knowing when the physical process would be done so I could go back to living. To carry a baby for over nine months, to love her, to bond with her, name her, to have a shower and prepare an older sibling; to labor with her, and then lose her literally as she is being born... I wouldn't even know where to begin to deal with this.

Please pray for C, for her husband and daughter M, and for her midwives Pam and Emily and doula Katie (not me), and for Baby P, who could not stay with us.


nicola said...

i am covered in shivers and tears. i am off to kiss my own babes. and C and her family are all in my thoughts. something similar has happened to 2 acquaintances. you mourn the loss of a child. something no parent should have to do.

Batty said...

Thoughts and prayers. That's just so sad, I don't know what to say.

caramama said...

I am so terribly sorry. I will pray for them.

(And thank you for being vague.)